‘Married at First Sight’: Can Instant Weddings Last in Nigeria?

Bisola Adebayo 12 min read

Last Updated on October 12, 2023

Introduction

Married at First Sight is a popular TV show that has gained international attention.

The premise of the show is that strangers meet for the first time at the altar.

There have been several versions of the show in different countries around the world.

This concept has not been without controversy and skepticism from critics and viewers.

Now, let’s turn our attention to Nigeria and whether instant weddings can last there.

In a traditional Nigerian society, marriage is a sacred institution with specific cultural values.

Arranged marriages are common in Nigeria but typically involve a longer courtship period.

The idea of marrying someone without getting to know them first may not sit well in Nigerian culture.

Furthermore, the success rate of marriages in Nigeria is already relatively low.

Factors such as compatibility, communication, and trust are crucial for any marriage to thrive.

Building these foundations takes time and cannot be achieved instantly at the altar.

While the concept of Married at First Sight may be intriguing, it may not be practical in Nigeria.

Basically, the success of a marriage depends on the individuals involved and their commitment to making it work.

Married at First Sight may make for entertaining television, but lasting marriages require more than just instant weddings.

Cultural Factors Influencing Marriage in Nigeria

Importance of Marriage in Nigerian Culture

Marriage in Nigeria transcends a mere legal contract; it’s a sacred covenant, deeply interwoven with spirituality and cultural identity.

It’s a symbol of maturity and social recognition.

Nigerian society values the union of a man and a woman as a fundamental building block.

Traditional Marriage Practices and Rituals

Traditional Nigerian weddings are grand affairs, characterized by colorful ceremonies, rhythmic dances, and sumptuous feasts.

Various ethnic groups have their unique customs, from the Yoruba’s engagement ceremony (Yoruba Betrothal Ceremony or “Mo mi mo”) to the Igbo’s “Igba Nkwu” celebration, and the Hausa’s “Fatihah” ceremony.

Significance of Family and Community Approval

Marriage in Nigeria isn’t solely a private affair; it’s a communal event.

The blessings of parents, elders, and the wider community are sought.

The couple’s union symbolizes the unity of two families, not just two individuals.

Prevalence of Arranged Marriages

In Nigeria, arranged marriages are not a relic of the past; they persist.

Families take an active role in choosing suitable partners, considering factors like social status, financial stability, and compatibility.

It’s not solely a matter of the heart; it’s about creating enduring family alliances.

Expectation of Lifelong Commitment in Nigerian Marriages

Nigerians place a premium on the longevity of marriage.

Divorce is often stigmatized.

Marriage is seen as a lifelong commitment, with couples expected to weather storms and cherish their union, reflecting a deep respect for tradition and cultural values.

Read: How ‘Married at First Sight’ Reflects & Challenges Nigerian Values

Challenges of Marrying at First Sight in Nigeria

Lack of time to build a foundation of trust and understanding

Instant weddings in Nigeria may not provide enough time for couples to establish trust and understanding.
Without a foundation, it becomes difficult to navigate the challenges that arise in a marriage.
Building a relationship requires time and effort, which may not be possible in instant marriages.

Lack of shared values and compatibility assessment

In traditional Nigerian weddings, families ensure compatibility and shared values before marriage.
Instant weddings do not provide the opportunity to assess and align values between partners.
This lack of shared values can lead to conflicts and dissatisfaction in the marriage.

Unrealistic expectations and emotional immaturity

Instant weddings can foster unrealistic expectations about marriage and the partner.
Emotional maturity is crucial for handling the ups and downs of a relationship, which may be lacking in instant marriages.
Unrealistic expectations and emotional immaturity can strain the relationship and lead to an unhappy marriage.

Potential struggles with social support and acceptance

Nigerian society places great importance on social support and acceptance of a couple’s union.
Instant weddings may face challenges in gaining social support and acceptance from family and friends.
This lack of support can create stress and strain on the marriage, leading to potential dysfunction.

Possible clash between modern and traditional Nigerian values

Nigeria is a country with a rich blend of modern and traditional values.
Instant weddings may face challenges in reconciling the clash between these two value systems.
This clash can create tension and conflicts within the marriage, making it difficult to sustain.

Difficulties in adjusting to a new living environment and lifestyle

Instant weddings mean couples are suddenly thrust into a new living environment and lifestyle.
Adjusting to these changes can be overwhelming and stressful for the newlyweds.
The lack of time to adapt can strain the relationship and contribute to marital dissatisfaction.

Read: Breaking Down ‘Married at First Sight’: Love or Entertainment?

Married at First Sight': Can Instant Weddings Last in Nigeria?

Success Stories and Lessons from Nigerian Instant Marriages

Real-life examples of successful instant marriages in Nigeria.

Mr. and Mrs. Adekunle – A couple who met through an instant marriage program and are now happily married for five years.
Mr. and Mrs. Ibrahim – Another success story of a couple who took the plunge and found lasting love.

These examples prove that instant marriages can indeed last in Nigeria.

Factors that contributed to their success

Compatibility: Both couples had a strong foundation of compatibility and shared values.
Shared goals: They were aligned in their long-term plans and aspirations for their relationship and family.
Commitment: The couples were committed to putting in effort and working through challenges together.

Importance of compatibility and shared goals

Compatibility ensures that couples have similar views on important aspects of life, leading to a smoother relationship.
Shared goals help couples stay focused and motivated to work towards a common future.
When couples are on the same page, it becomes easier to navigate through difficulties and build a strong bond.

Significance of effective communication and compromise

Both successful couples prioritize open and honest communication, allowing them to resolve conflicts effectively.
Compromise plays a crucial role in reaching decisions that satisfy both parties and maintain harmony.
Without effective communication and compromise, even the most compatible couples may struggle to sustain their relationship.

Role of personal growth and willingness to adapt

Successful couples recognized the importance of personal growth and continuously worked on themselves.
They were willing to adapt and make necessary adjustments to accommodate each other’s needs and growth.
By embracing change and personal development, these couples strengthened their bond and built a thriving relationship.

Generally, while instant weddings may raise skepticism, there are success stories in Nigeria that prove their potential.

Compatibility, shared goals, effective communication, compromise, personal growth, and willingness to adapt are vital elements for long-lasting relationships.

Read: Navigating the First Year: Advice for Quick Marriages in Nigeria

Case Studies: Failed Nigerian Instant Marriages

Instances where instant marriages in Nigeria did not last

Several cases of instant marriages in Nigeria have ended in failure and disappointment.

Couples who entered these marriages without getting to know each other faced challenges.

Instances of couples separating or filing for divorce within a short period are prevalent.

Common reasons for failure in these cases

Lack of compatibility and understanding between the partners is a leading cause of failure.

Unrealistic expectations and the pressure to conform to societal norms contribute to the breakdown.

Abrupt realization of personality differences or incompatible future goals are also common factors.

Assertion that instant marriages require more than just initial attraction

Mere physical attraction and infatuation are insufficient foundations for a lasting marriage.

Emotional compatibility and shared values should also be present from the beginning.

Building a solid foundation requires time, patience, and a willingness to know each other deeply.

Importance of trust, emotional connection, and commitment

Trust is critical in any relationship, and instant marriages are no exception.

An emotional connection helps partners navigate the challenges and uncertainties that arise.

Commitment to working through difficulties and supporting each other is essential.

Lessons that can be learned from these failures

Instant marriages serve as cautionary tales to individuals considering such arrangements.

Investing time in getting to know someone before making a lifetime commitment is crucial.

Open communication, realistic expectations, and shared interests contribute to a successful marriage.

Learning from failed instant marriages can improve the chances of lasting love and happiness.

Read: Reasons Nigerians Are Hooked on ‘Married at First Sight’ Shows

Conclusion

Recap of Challenges and Factors

Instant weddings in Nigeria face significant challenges.

Cultural and familial expectations often clash, causing strain.

Financial stress and compatibility issues frequently loom large.

Acknowledgment of Effort

Regardless of the initial wedding scenario, successful marriages demand commitment and effort.

The foundation may be unique, but the building process is universal.

Final Thoughts on Possibilities and Limitations

Instant weddings in Nigerian society hold both promise and limitations.

They can work when couples prioritize open communication, compromise, and growth together.

However, quick unions should not underestimate the complexities of marriage, understanding that longevity requires continual investment and unwavering love.